fiddlestick | IC Contact

[ He's got it! When the light goes green, at least he's down to undoing the buttons of . . . the button-down's cuffs. You thought. What's next? The whole thing? The pants? No, your little heart can relax, his mad abs will make an appearance some other day. ]

Alright, [ He says, still smirking, making a few turns here and there, before forcing his sleeves up. ] see anything?

[ He can't look for you, he still needs to be a responsible driver— but that's certainly something peeking out from his sleeve, on his skin, ink stretching close to his elbow . . . ]

[His little heart is sure racing at this. Eren dangerously stripping while also driving. He knows he said he had a surprise, but this was not what he had in mind-!

But he'll look at his arm for Eren. It takes a second to notice but that sure looks like--]

-- Is that a tattoo??

Yep.

[ andddd— the winner is you. look how proud he looks! raising said sleeve up a little higher as he parks the car, eren finally has enough room to show him more. they might have to get inside so he can show him the rest, since it climbs up past the shoulder, but most of it is clear: feathers, a wing that stretches in a way that follows the contours of muscle. ]

My graduation present. It goes up to, [ he reaches over to his shoulder blade. ] here.

[Elliot looks at the tattoo as Eren reveals it with complete awe, his eyes transfixed on it. Now that he can see more, he can tell it's a wing even if part of it is covered up. It was very fitting for Eren, with how much he always wanted to fly. How much he valued freedom.]

Wow.

[But more than that...]

Eheh, i-it makes you look so tough and cool...

[It was really hot. The longer he looks it, it becomes clear there's a distinct blush on his face. He wrings his hands together, to stop himself from reaching out and touching it. ]

[ then— he liked it. the color on his face alone (but not without ignoring the complements), has eren basking in his own vibrancy, ear tips giving him away. elliot, there's more though. eren unclips his seatbelt and does the same to elliot's. where they happen to be if he looks around . . . in the city somewhere. there're a lot of buildings. ]

Wanna see the rest?

[Thanks Eren for doing that, because Elliot is way too busy having Gay Thoughts to even remember he's wearing a seatbelt.]

T-the rest? Y-you mean-

[DEEP BREATH. Then said very quickly so it almost comes out as a squeak]

Yes please!

[ At least Elliot seems excited enough to get on with the rest-! Eren’s failed to pick up any gay cues, and continues to smile at the enthusiasm. He’ll grab his things from the back seat, blazer and cap included, before beginning to slip out of the car. Ah, one more thing before he does, though. ]

You’re gonna have to close your eyes for a bit. Deal?

[He'll take another deep breath and slip out of the car too, shutting the door behind him.]

Huh?

[weird request but okay...]

Aha um, okay. Deal. [He shuts his eyes and hold out his hand to be taken] Just make sure I don't walk into anything okay?

[ eren wants the surprise factor ever present, and feeling just how little elliot is waiting for makes for a rather rare grin. perhaps you won’t see it at its brightest, elliot, but he does take his hand and lead him along. he’ll even adjust to make him feel a little more secure, going from his hand to encircling his back— and walking.

he didn’t park right in front of it after all . . . looks like they’re walking into some building. ]

You trust me, right?

[He'll let himself be led, making sure his eyes stay close as they walk. He can tell they walked into some place by the change of the air and sounds- but that was about it.

That question is easy for him to answer, at least]

Haha, absolutely. You know that.

[ it’s obvious they’ve walked into an elevator for a few moments, with the sound and the sensation of ascension, his hand gripping elliot’s shoulder and pulling him closer to him. he was getting . . . better at this, he hoped. a little more confident in closing in on some proximity, his fingers stroking his shoulder— and caught staring down at him, feeling his chest pop and a little extra something stir when he stopped to just watch him. watch his face, eyes taking in every detail from the way his hair falls to softly closed eyes and lips, and, and, hah. that’s where he’ll stop, thanks.

(he sure was thinking about it— and it makes him a little anxious going from a previous “i’m not into it” to “i’m . . . curious”. lord.)

but soon enough, he’s moving them again, hooking his arm (clearing his throat to shake that nerve off) and guiding elliot’s into it so he could follow. a few more steps and they’re at a door, keys clinking together and the sound of something large and slobbery sniffing said door with the intensity of a thousand noses. the thing snarls, and eren makes sure he’s the one to enter first.

with it open, elliot will probably feel the chilly snout of a dog smelling him. tsst eren would say, snapping his fingers and getting his attention to leave elliot alone. with the click of the door behind them, both of eren’s hands are on the other’s shoulder, taking one, two, three more steps . . . ]

Open up.

[ to reveal a spacious, top notch apartment complex that looked more like a house with the space that came with it, a spot outside for lounging, and a pretty neat view of the city as a whole. nothing too fancy, but there’s tv, video games, rather plain decor, but at the same time, very eren. wait until you see his room.

also, there’s titan. ]

[It's a little bizarre, having to go through an elevator ride with his eyes closed. But He feels Eren pull him closer, and that gets a little smile out of him. He could tell from body language alone that Eren was getting a little better about it, or at least less nervous. He was glad for it.

But soon enough they're moving again, with Eren guiding him. Elliot takes note of every sound: the jingle of keys, the sound of a dog sniffing the door and snarling, the opening of a door. And followed by that, he feels the chilly snout. The dog must be huge but Elliot doesn't flinch. It must be Titan, he thinks to himself, with Eren commanding him away. And then it's a couple more steps and...

He opens his eyes, and they immediately widen at the look of the place. It was huge and fancy. Much bigger than what he lived in back in New York by far. It might even be enough to rival his house in Recolle- though in terms of building condition it definitely had his place beat. Basically, it's way nicer than anything that Elliot's ever lived in. AND LOOK AT THAT VIEW.

At the same time? Yeah, it did seem to have a thing about it that screamed Eren. There was little doubt who lived in this place, even if they hadn't just walked in and were greeted by Titan]

Wow...this is your place? It's incredible...!

It was, [ he starts, giving his dog a pat over the head before leading elliot over to the couch for a seat. titan will follow with curiosity, scanning their guest before he trots away into one of the rooms to grab a plastic toy tire and bring it over to show them. he’s not really one to ask for too much attention, reserved and content with sharing the space.

once they’re sitting, eren begins to smile again, turning his body enough to face him and lean forward in his seat. ] before I moved to Fort McCoy, when I started basic. I was gonna put it up for rent, but. [ he had planned on staying there— to be honest, he had moved there and everything, but . . .

with all of his belongings back in place, it was pretty clear where he’d be living. ]

I’m moving back. [ with a soft look in his eyes when he glances at elliot: ] I can see you a lot more here than the fort.

[He'll sit on the couch next to Eren, his own body turned enough to face him. When Titan comes over to show off his toy, he'll give the dog a good scratch behind the ears before turning his attention back to Eren.

"I’m moving back. I can see you a lot more here than the fort."

Elliot's eyes widen at that as the words sink in. It's not surprising Eren had planned to live at the fort. You didn't need to live at the fort, lots of people don't. His dad hadn't and neither did other people in his family. But Eren was the type that'd choose to live at the fort- to embrace that way of life with complete devotion. It would be a very Eren-like move. And yet-

"I can see you a lot more here than the fort."

He was moving back. So he could see him more. He was moving back...for him. That's how strongly he felt about him.

He blush on his face? It comes back and this time it's so strong that his entire face is almost redder than his hair. He even seems to be loss for words, opening his mouth and trying to speak but-]

I-i-i- [It basically trails off into some strangled squeaky sounds. Holy crap.]

[ he would’ve done just that, perhaps if elliot had stayed in new york instead of moving to recollé. he wouldn’t have realized how deep feelings had laced and nothing would’ve sparked enough for him to notice without that sudden locality. he could still run after his dreams while keeping something equally important in minds with the right balance. he just— didn’t want to be so far away anymore, and of course, the liberty and privacy to go about it.

elliot’s stuttering might’ve been a little worrying at first, but only when he connects to the flush with the reason, he notices how deep that actually was, even if it felt like something so . . . natural and obvious. if you’re too far, get closer. if it’s too crowded, make space. that’s what you get for following your heart more than thought. as sheepish as they both were at this point, eren’s shoulder bumps into elliot’s as he gives a slight scoot over, reaching to curl two fingers into elliot’s, giving a small stroke with his thumb to offer calm. ]

Surprise.

[Surprise huh? Yeah, surprised was a very good way to sum up Elliot's feelings. There are a hundred different thoughts in his head right now, zooming through as fast as sixty-fourth notes. Some are belittling towards himself ("I'm not worth this"), but so many more are just in awe of Eren. What an incredible person Eren was. How lucky he was to have Eren.

He tries again with words, but it doesn't work. His mouth feels dry, this throat closed up, and so many things he thinks to say doesn't sound right. It's his reflex to berate himself in response to things like this, he did it all the time. But he knew Eren would hate to hear that, and he's been told enough times to stop that. He didn't want to ruin this moment that Eren had clearly planned out because he had such trouble with himself. So maybe his mouth was working in his favor for not working.

Instead when Eren bumps shoulders with him and strokes his thumb, he'll shut his eyes and give a touched smile. He takes a deep breath, letting himself try to calm down for a moment. He's happy, he's really happy. Even if he's not sure he's worth this, he's really happy at what this all means. The happiness bubbles up inside of him, until he feels the overwhelming urge to do something. Show some sort of sign of how much Eren's gesture means to him.

Finally, without really thinking about it, he'll open his eyes and look over at Eren's face. Then he leans over quickly to plant a single kiss on Eren's cheek.

Thank you.]

[ and that’s it. that’s how eren jaeger died in this life.

A single peck that made sparks go off like fireworks. cheek kisses have been received before, but not any that didn’t bore and disinterest him. in fact, he never gave liberty to get that close, a reason the past relationship never got far enough to begin with. this made him flare from the inside out, into a reddened mess to the point that he couldn’t speak. hopefully his hands aren’t too hot because that’s something he feels, until he can’t really feel his hands at all. or his legs, where was he. he’s gone off somewhere, and it’s left a numbing sensation in his stomach that evolves into tumbles the more he stares at elliot with a never ending smile.

say something! no wait, he’s already tried and he hasn’t even realized it, trying to mouth something and only managing a press of his lips tightly together. like the first time they held hands on the hood of his car, eren can’t form words. at all. it wasn’t supposed to be that big of a deal, but it was— especially when the storm of emotion blows right through him when it never did before. it felt like a huge deal. he almost can’t contain himself, and for moments on end just keeps smiling, and staring. it’s a loop that he’s caught in and, hah, good luck getting out of it.

it brought with it an intense desire to respond in his own way, instinct telling him to go when he didn’t even stop to think go where. his heart was pounding, and it was all he heard as he kept staring, watching, forgetting everything that wasn’t the guy next to him, fingers fidgeting against his.

he was nervous, but everything had a first time. there was no ‘too early’ or ‘too late’, only the time that felt right, and the warmth that boiled in him until his gut did flips was what drew him to slowly lean in, without the unhelpful thoughts that would’ve stopped him. it’s without thinking, all heart and no head. he holds his breath and feels ready to explode when he closes his eyes and goes that extra dip, feeling an awkwardly placed, but surprisingly gentle first kiss.

its obvious, for someone who has, that he’s never done this before. there’s even a slight tremble in the hold on elliot’s fingers, be it from the rush, the nerves, the excitement, or everything in one big pot. ]

[He had glanced away after he kissed Eren on the cheek, his face feeling completely red and not being ready to see what reaction he'd give. After a moment of silence, he had peaked out of the corner of his eye to see Eren completely red as well, and smiling.

Maybe he should've expected was came next, but he's still caught by surprise. It seems to happen all at once and in slow motion. Eren leaning close, dipping his head....and then the feeling of gentle lips on his. Eren's lips on his.

Unlike Eren, this wasn't Elliot's first kiss. He's kissed a few other people before, guys and girls. Mostly during late night games on overnight fieldtrips and one time dates. With the girls, he hadn't felt anything besides a little awkward, even when there was nothing wrong with the kiss itself. It was with the guys he felt something. Felt something enough to enjoy it.

This however, being kissed by a guy he liked a lot? Even if it was gentle, even if it was clear that Eren barely knew what he was doing- it was on whole other level. He can feel his chest explode with feeling, his heart jump into his throat. He'll respond and kiss him back with no hesistation, keeping it as slow and gentle as Eren is but with clearly more skill. Yet it doesn't matter to him how skilled Eren was- this moment is euphoric. He wants to live in it as long as possible.

But, all things come to an end. And eventually, Elliot gently breaks off the kiss. And as he does, the nagging fears in his mind start to reappear. The real reason why he was so okay with taking forever to kiss, why he never pushed Eren. It wasn't just that he was patient, that he was fairly innocent himself. Those things were part of it, sure, but... ]

W-Was that...

[Eren never said to be gay. Before all this, Eren never expressed any interest in anyone physically. It was clear Eren liked the handholding, the hugs, the little touches .... but anyone could enjoy those without actually being attracted, so long as you cared enough about the person, and it was easy to mix up those feelings. But a kiss on the other hand... a kiss was different. If you weren't actually attracted to someone, a kiss would make it abundantly clear.

And with a guy like Eren, who never held any interest in this before, it wasn't impossible that he'd realize he was just crossing wires all this time.]

S-Still like me...?

Edited 2017-10-07 21:13 (UTC)

[ oooooh christ that certainly is a kiss right back, and he thinks to himself whoa. it’s not that he dislikes it— he would’ve pulled back and retreated immediately if that were the case; if anything, it’s the slight inhale he gives through the nose and a stiffened posture that signal his surprise. he knew he had to press a, but what was the combo code??? eren stays there, right there, the hold on his hand hooking more into elliot’s and mimicking the only reference he had (this one) to the best of his prowess. he probably doesn’t part his lips a whole ton, if not at all, but as unrefined as he was, it didn’t lessen what he felt when weight pushed back onto him, when their lips stayed pressed. it was bigger than the peck, which was supposed to be no huge deal, so imagine this. imagine if it gets better. was it possible to just burst from it all?

it felt plausible, because his chest feels like it’s leading a band. curiosity was satiated, and he knew that he had liked it more than he thought he would’ve. he pulls away as elliot does, eyes wide as they begin to open and not a single spot of peachy skin in sight. elliot’s first words might’ve aggravated the situation, in which the smile gradually returns to eren with a great deal of embarrassment, declining his head. was that . . . yeah, his first. he nods, the cat’s out of the bag (not that it wasn’t something outrageous to assume). he’d be made fun of to no end if groupies found out, only allowing a kiss after eighteen years of life. he can hear the too precious for this world jokes rolling right in if that got leaked.

at least, it’s not a worry he has with elliot right now, even if the self-consciousness is there. if anything, that kiss had made him more stupid than before, content with just swimming around the aftertaste of what he just jumped into and feeling like a ton of little birds were flapping around in his belly. was that why he took so long?

that was— elliot kissing him. him kissing elliot, but he got one right back. elliot. the closeness to that was . . . amazing. to be that close to him, to share something like that, he’ll probably be reliving it all day. he can still feel it tingle his lips, and right now, no matter how hard he tried . . . how the hell does he stop smiling?

the second part of the question has him lift his head fully, revealing the complete state he’s in: not appalled, or confused, or uncertain and lost— he’s giddy. he’s positively giddy. his fingers are still shaking, and he’d probably say something like ufduhbuh if he tried to word too soon. his mind is doing sprints around the world, he can’t catch up.

it’s because he’s found something. he’s found something he’s unconsciously been looking for for much longer than most people can bare to wait. it’s like............. atlantis. ]

Still— do I still like you?

[ is that what he’s asking? elliot, look at him. look at this smile, this beaming, this light that can give enough energy to supply a powerplant. he takes his hand with a much firmer hold, cupping all of it into his and opening his mouth.

closing his mouth. ah man. just in case he can’t see, he’ll briefly guide elliot’s face up with his free hand, to look at him. ]

That was for real. [ from the meaning, to that sensation that came with it (if elliot felt the same thing), to the emotion he was showing on his sleeve at this very moment. ] . . . As shitty as I am at it.

[Eren, I'm sorry, but he already had it pegged that this was your first kiss. He's seen you flip out over hand-holding, it's not a hard deduction to make.

He had been looking down, as if he's scared to watch an axe to drop. But then Eren takes his hand, and guides his face up with his free hand and-

Eren's beaming. It's not just a regular smile, Eren looks downright giddy with happiness. There was no way Eren of all people could fake such a look- he was too honest and too serious. If he was making that face, then that must mean it was the truth - it was for real.

He lets out a little laugh of relief, the fear and doubt getting washed away once again for happiness. He's smiling right back at him]

Heehee, just making sure. [He lifts his free hand to Eren's shoulder] A-And you're not that bad. It just takes practice.

[ like watching a foal try to walk around for the first time, he imagines. not that bad, hah. his cheeks might be hurting a little from how much he’s been grinning (or burning). he’s so glad titan isn’t one of those dogs that start sniffing and poking you like something’s wrong. he’s just chewing his tire . . .

well then, he’s still freaking out. a good freaking out, mind you— he looks to elliot, chuckles, looks to the ground, then back to elliot, rinse and repeat. you’ve. gone and made him stupid. what’s worse, he wants to give it another try eyes darting down to his lips once or twice, but he’s so absolutely stupefied he can only keep his body turned and welcoming while he sucks in his own lips.

elliot . . . you really are a wizard. ]

I, just sort of, I never. Shit. [ he huffs with an airy laugh. felt this. there he goes not using words right because he’s all over the god damn place. ] What made you think that?

[This is his true power. He'll let Eren keep looking around, trying to sort out his own stupefied thoughts. His own giddiness manifests in smiles and laughs. If he was standing, he'd probably be a little bouncy as well, but oh, thank goodness for small favors]

Ehehe...well, you've never kissed a guy, right? S-Sometimes people will think they're attracted but then they, um, try...and it'll turn out...not so much?

S-Sorry, that made more sense in my head. It was probably stupid to worry about it.

I’ve never kissed a girl, either.

[ but he knows what he’s saying, or rather tries to understand it. it’s what jasmine mentioned once that he gets, now. it was never the right person, so he never felt the true necessity until it was there. he inhales though, rubbing the back of his neck. if there’s one person that should know, it’s obviously the person he wants to be with right now. ]

Honestly, Elliot . . . I don’t even know what the hell I am. [ and whenever he thought about it, he’d fall back into the same cycle of questions without the proper orientation, and it doesn’t change anything in the end. kindly screw names for it or whatever, but he does hope that it’s not . . . weird enough to scare him off. ] I just know that . . . I like you. I don’t think it really matters if you’re a guy.

[ guess that makes him elliotsexual or something. ]

Haha, that...doesn't surprise me but I didn't want to say it...

[You know, try to save some face for you. Like a true bro. bro-boyfriend.]

Aww. I like you too. [He gives him a warm and affectionate look.] Don't worry, it doesn't matter to me what you are. You're Eren - that's all I care about.

I just get nervous sometimes ... you know how I am.

[ the greatest bro-boyfriend that ever lived right now . . . and at this point, eren doesn’t know what else to do that didn’t have to do with smiling stupidly, and opts to actually embrace him with an arm, pulling him close and pretty much bumping heads sideways. a headbutt! ]

I know a little too much. [ but if elliot was nervous, then what was eren . . . a riddle you’d find under a bottle cap. ] Swear that you won’t worry about that, [ he holds a free hand out again, asking for the same shake he did back on the beach. shake on it. ] and I will too.

[ at least, they’d try. elliot frets quite a bit and eren had that so-serious-it-dramatic streak, it could be a recipe for nerve bundling. ]

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