fiddlestick | aefenglom IC Inbox

So...

[Towa doesn't know much better than he does what to start with. It certainly feels like there's a large number of things she needs to say... wants to say, but it's not neatly organized in her brain-- it's all chaos.

Even so. She has to try. Even if it's a mess coming out of her mouth-- at least this time it's going to be an honest mess.

This is too important not to. Elliot was too important for her not to.]

Um-- I know I said some pretty terrible things yesterday. I don't blame you for getting upset. None of it... came out the way I wanted to, and it just got worse...

[She has to take a breath to avoid all the words kind of running together in a rush. But after she does, she starts again.]

But that's no excuse. I should have just been honest about my feelings from the start, but I was worried about what you'd think about... how it might affect other things... what others might think. We've never... really shared anything about... us... with other people. And it's not exactly a... simple... situation.

The last thing I wanted was for it to be something that would hurt you, though.

[He's glad that she decides to go first, and he'll be quiet as he listens to what she says. He's had some time to calm down, so it's easier to see things from her point of view. She was trying to protect his image, even if it meant hiding what they had.

There was at least one bit he can answer honestly]

...I don't care what others think, Towa.

[He bites his lip a little]

I mean, sure I think about it sometimes like anyone would, but ... being at Thors taught me to live my life how I want to live, even if someone is against it. Otherwise, I probably would've enlisted in the army like my dad wanted.

[Which would've been a terrible choice, and he's very glad it didn't end up like that]

So... maybe it's embarrassing sometimes and in general I am a pretty private person so it's not like I'm going to shout from the rooftops about any of my relationships, but ... Well, the only opinion I really care about in this, is yours Towa.

Are you ... okay with other people knowing?

[Some things are complicated. Others are not at all. When he says that he doesn't care what others think-- only her-- it does help put her at ease.]

No, not at all. Even so... saying that I like you... isn't fair. Because that's not how I really feel.

[Her fingers are still interlocked in front of her, fidgeting awkwardly, but there's a smile on her face. She's done this once before. It's about time that she came clean again.]

There are three people in this world that I would truly say without hesitation that I really, truly love-- and you're one of them.

[It's a minor difference in theory, but to her it made a big difference to be able to say it.]

It took me some time to wrap my head around, because it's very new to me. And... I'm not very good with confessions. But... I've meant to for a while now. I just... wish I could have said it when it really counted.

[His eyes widen in surprise. In all the ways his brain envisioned this conversation going, the L word wasn't one that was uttered]

T-Towa...

[It catches him off his guard (granted, an easy thing to do), enough that he falters for what to do. A whole evening of his own anxiety tearing him down (he wasn't good enough, something was wrong with him) had made him steel for terrible outcomes. To get through a painful conversation and then find some place to lick his wounds before working towards getting things back home back to normal. ]

Y...You really feel that way?

[His brain is trying to process this here, stand by]

That’s how I really feel... no holding back. I’d never lie about something this important. You might not be the first, but to me— you’re just as important as the other two.

[For her, how this would go— she didn’t know. Still doesn’t feel like she really knows for sure. But it didn’t matter what the result was. She wanted to say this. She didn’t want to leave any potential loose ends or regrets.

He deserved to know.]

Ellie... I love you. And I don’t care who knows. As long as you know, that’s what really matters.

I...

[Yep, this is really happening. He can guess who the other two are, and he doesn't mind that there are other two. Does he know how this will go? Of course not.

But he does know what's in his own heart, the feelings he's had for Towa. How close they've grown, how much they've bonded - especially in the past couple months since that morning.]

...I-I love you too, Towa. [It's not like he thought about it beforehand, but the words still feel true as he says them. He lets out a little sound] Though to tell you the truth, I wasn't expecting to hear that today.

[That's not a bad thing though. If anything, there's a lessening of tension in his stance ]

After yesterday... I went through a million different thoughts. Painful, scary, sad thoughts that... made me think about many things, including myself.

[It’s only been a little over half a day at best but it’s been a long twelve or so hours for her. But really, it’s probably something that she’s needed to face for a while now. They talked a bit about the things she didn’t like about herself regarding her relationships with people at the masquerade well— now was the time to truly tackle those things. Before it truly became something terrible.]

I’ve always told myself that I could accept rejection, as long as that was what made the other person happy. I could be content with that. But... the truth is, I’m not really happy with that kind of half-hearted feeling at all. If I lost you— if you’d have decided you no longer wanted anything to do with me... I’d be devastated.

[And she’d truly feared it. And in the wake of those thoughts she felt several things go into perspective.]

So I can’t keep pretending that I feel that way. I have to accept... me. The way I am.

[Including the parts of her that truly wants things. Even at the risk of being selfish. The vulnerable human that feels things so deeply and still overthinks everything.]

Hearing you say that... means so much.

[He takes a deep breath, taking all that in. The sheer honesty of it, her willing to admit something that she'd probably thinks is completely selfish, even if it's true.]

I...I feel the same way.

Yesterday..when you said that stuff to Marie, it hurt. I know our relationship is a little...complicated, but it felt like all the feelings I had shown to you hadn't really meant anything to you. That what we have didn't matter. Or worse...you thought I hadn't meant anything that I did or said.

I-I know now you were just trying to protect me, but ... that's why I got so upset. Because I really do care about what we have ... and I don't want to throw it aside because I might like someone else too.

I doubt myself a lot... but I've never once doubted you. When you said you liked me, I knew that you truly meant it-- even if you might not have figured out how much yet.

This wasn't exactly how I planned it, but-- since things just kind of happened... this is probably the best time.

[Towa pulls out of her pocket a necklace. It has a matching partner however-- this one's a bit different. It's currently glowing a bright yellowish orange and the small gem on it is a similar orange hue, unlike it's moonlit brother.]

This is the second piece of a special set that I commissioned for some very special people.

[She mentioned it once-- an idea-- way back when they were still figuring things out. Something she wanted to do for Rean and Elliot. Well, she'd given Rean his when she confessed so now it was Elliot's turn.]

Like the sun, you're warm and bright and kind. So it's no wonder that you remind me of it. Your passion shines brighter than anyone I know. It can light up a room and light a fire in people's hearts. I know... it sure has in mine.

[Without waiting, she gently loops the protective charm around his neck.]

During the morning hours, it's always shining. It doesn't matter if you're somewhere dark-- it'll still give off light. It will protect you from spells or potions that seek to harm you or cause ill effects during the light hours, as long as you're in it's light. But during the night time, it sleeps, and turns a pitch black.

[Towa was a source of never-ending surprises today. Once more, his eyes widen as she pulls out the necklace. It's a beautiful necklace, and as she speaks, it becomes so obvious she put so much thought into it]

Whoa...T-Towa....

[He doesn't know if he's really like the sun, but it's a touching sentiment all the same, along with the protection spell.

There's no resistance when she puts it on him, just him reaching to touch the pendant, looking at the glowing gem in his hand.]

It's...beautiful, Towa. I can't believe you got something like this for me, especially with such a spell...

[It's an incredible moving and thoughtful gesture. He doesn't know how to possibly thank her. The best he can do is reach out for that hand that's pulling away, and take it into his with a gentle squeeze]

...Thank you. I'll be sure to stay in its light. Though...really, I feel like it's more apt to think of it as your light.

[Because if anyone was like the sun, it was Towa]

It took me a while, but I really wanted to give it to you on a special occasion. And... well. I can't think of anything more special than this. I'm so glad you like it.

[This was so worth the wait. It feels so good to finally have been able to give it to it's rightful owner. Seeing it on him just feels right.]

Well... I wouldn't really mind if you wanted to think of it that way.

[It might not be the intended interpretation but it was incredibly sweet and romantic.]

I really do. Though, haha, now I feel a little bad I didn't think to bring a gift in return.

[Because you know, he didn't expect this conversation to go this well!!!]

So are we okay? I understand now you were trying to protect me. You really were put on the spot there by Marie.

[Shaking her head, she squeezed his hand back.]

Hm-mm. You already gave me more than enough.

[This was the best possible outcome for today, beyond even her wildest dreams.]

Maybe it happened for a reason. Either way... you don't need me to protect you. And I'm not going to hide things anymore.

[Using her other hand, she hooks her finger around the front of his shirt and tugs him in close enough that she can lean over and kiss him over the table.]

Yeah, don't worry about me.

[Okay, assertive Towa is a hot Towa. He finds himself getting tugged in an kissed. He kisses back, hand reaching up to curl her bangs in his finger. He lets it last for a long moment before pulling back.

There's a smile on his face. Were they not in a public restaurant, he'd be inclined to keep it going]

Haha...that said, we should still probably figure out what to tell people if they ask.

[Since let's not have a play by play description of their open relationship every time someone nosy asks cause that'll get old quick]

[If they weren’t in public right now, she would too. Well— that and the gentle growling of her hungry stomach, as her appetite finds itself again.]

...whoops. Maybe I’ll just hold onto that thought for later.

[What good is a couple’s first fight without the amazing make-up sex at the end?]

But you’re right. It’s not like there is any one thing but... whether it’s “boyfriend” or “lover”... neither of those things feel wrong. But I think it might be best to just be honest about it. At least with the people closest to us that would really ask for details. For anyone else— settling on a title you’re comfortable with is probably enough.

[He laughs when he hears the stomach growl. It is surprisingly adorable]

Y-Yeah, you should order some food first. It's on me, don't worry.

[Save the sexy plans for later]

I agree, better to be honest about it than make up some story. [Since that'll just lead to more trouble and hurt feelings] As for the title ... I'd rather not use "girlfriend-boyfriend", since those tend to be a little more exclusive? And I don't think either of us want to deal with people accusing us of cheating.

[Both of them knew that they were with other people. Elliot didn't have a problem with it. Towa was free to be with who she wanted. But he could see other people getting the wrong idea]

So I guess..."lover" is probably the easiest one to use.

Ehehe... thanks.

[As much as it's her natural response to insist she can pay for it-- she's just going to purposefully stop herself. It's okay to be treated once in a while. And she is really hungry.]

Considering how well they know us and-- the fact that some of them are involved already-- I'm pretty sure that even if we tried to make something up, they'd figure it out anyway.

[She nods, agreeing as she listens. It's simpler that way-- less room for confusion.]

Right. So... lovers it is.

Aw, it's nothing.

[Especially after you got him such a nice necklace!!!! Gonna treat you girl]

Haha, yeah pretty much. It'd just make things worse. So okay, "lover".

[He nods, approving. Yeah. That works for him.]

[And with that, he turns to try to wave down a waiter so Towa can order some food. He stops when he notices a lady at a table nearby. Even with a different haircut, a Vita fanboy is still a Vita fanboy, so the recognition is pretty instant]

Whoa-

[He quickly looks away before he can be accused of staring. It's...it's gotta be a coincidence right? Vita wasn't in Aefenglom.

But he'll still tell Towa in a low voice]

I-Is it just me...or does that lady over there look exactly like Vita?

[It only takes her a moment to decide on something to eat since her stomach is happy to decide for her. But in the process, she misses the expression on Elliot's face until he calls it to her attention.

Towa actually has to look closer-- unlike Elliot, she doesn't really know Vita that well. But... there is an uncanny resemblance.

There's only one explanation that she can think of, considering that there had been no signs of new arrivals.]

...in that case... there's only one person I know who would use that face.

[She taps her nails on the table. If this was what she thought it was... her nail taps on the table three more times before she raises her voice a little.]

If you were so worried, you could have just said so.

[!!!!]

W-Wait, Whaaaaa-?!

[ "Vita" looks over and laughs and because it's Crow, he's even got an audio illusion up to resemble the real one's voice. ]

So... you caught me, huh?

There aren’t that many people I’d expect to do something like this, so it wasn’t that difficult you know.

[WHAT

THE

FRICK?!]

S-Seriously!?! You were listening the whole time?!

I was curious! Can you blame me?

[ "Vita" shakes "her" head and laughs. ]

I'm glad it worked out for you two, though.

Edited 2019-12-15 22:34 (UTC)

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