fiddlestick | aefenglom IC Inbox

[Oh wow, he wasn't expecting to get contacted privately by Shinjiro. His first thought isn't about Shinjiro's weird thing with Fie. Maybe he'd be relieved to know that...if it wasn't for the fact that his first thought instead is "Oh Aidios did someone get stabbed?". When you are called to heal this guy twice and that's your main interaction, you tend to see trends ok.

But...but maybe this is a normal thing. Gotta try not to jump to conclusions.]

Oh hey Shinjiro!

Yeah I'm not doing anything. [Anything that takes more priority than a potential stabbing anyway] What's up?

[NOT.... THE LEAST LIKELY OF ASSUMPTIONS. Sadly. But at least nothing too terribly crazy has happened this time.

He just. Needs to figure out what to actually say now that he's got someone on the line. Because 'please explain feelings to me, I'm fucking confused' is apparently not what he'll manage.]

ok so if you say anything about this to fie i'll kick your ass

[Okay. Sure. Baseless threats. Great start. Gotta tsun before you can dere and all that.]

youve known her for a while. louis says she likes me and i should ask her out. she's a good friend and i like when shes happy and all but i dont wanna screw anything up.

[god even just rereading this he feels stupid and pathetic. Just. Advice plz.]

Edited (html 50% improved!) 2019-11-20 17:54 (UTC)

[Oh. Ohhhh. This is much better than someone being stabbed]

[Okay even if there's the temptation to tease, he'll lay off it since Shinjiro and him aren't exactly friends. ]

Don't worry, I won't tell her.

So you're thinking of asking her out?

[thx u elliot, you're probably the only person who won't be a complete ass about his inability to function like a normal human being. (Well. Human/Goat being.)

Ugh just give him a minute this is already. Hard. Especially since they don't even exactly know each other. And Shinjiro is basically The Worst Ever when it comes to opening up about anything.]

i dunno. anything like that always seemed like a bad idea to me back home. why get anyones hopes up or whatever. but i guess i aint gone from here yet.

i just dont wanna do it and then it turn out to just makes things worse. i dont even know how much of a difference is there to going out and us being friends and being bonded here.

Edited 2019-11-20 19:19 (UTC)

[He's pretty used to people who fail at functioning like normal people. Like most of Class VII honestly]

Why would it be a bad idea? [a pause before he adds] I don't mean that rhetorically. Sometimes things can seem bigger than they are in our heads, so I find it helps to put words to them.

[It's something you pick up when you have to manage constant anxiety. And there's some other things he wants to ask about from what Shinjiro is saying. But one thing at a time so he don't overwhelms the guy with Emotions.]

[bless u, elliot. for being a Relatively Normal Guy.]

cause any of us could just stop existing here anytime. i'll go back to being dead, she'll go back home to find her old crew or whatever.

that or one or both of us is just mixed up and it screws up what friendship we already got.

it seems kinda shitty to ask someone out because people keep saying you should. not to mention she's already got herself hurt on my account when she didn't have to. but then again i dunno if thats what she wants or what. its fucking stupid.

[He tries his best. And ah, right, that classic fear]

Okay, I could see why you'd be worried about that. And it is a scary thought! But you know, that's something relationships everywhere deal with. Someone could leave, or die unexpectedly ... that's how life works. Though granted, things are a little more finite here.

[So in other words, your "I'm dead" care is not as valid a card as you think it is]

I do agree that it's bad to ask someone out just because people say you should though. So...forget what Fie wants, what Louis is telling you to do, or any of the "shoulds" for a moment.

What do you want?

[He's not convinced, but he also won't argue it. Because as always, it's so much more complicated than either of them are saying. or even can say. True, people always worry about loss, but here it's a guarantee. Hell, everyone he'd arrived with from his own world, save himself and Makoto, were already gone.

But that last question is hard. Fie had asked that once, too, in a different context. And just like then, his answer's the same:]

i dunno.

[It's never been about what he wants.]

not to screw up, mostly. i've got a pretty long track record of that.

[Breathes in.

Boi.]

Yeah ... the fastest way to screw up is to go with an answer only because you think it'll make people happy.

Sorry, but you're gonna have to actually think about YOUR feelings and wants on this.

hey fuck off i know that alright? why do you think i bothered texting you

[clearly just to vent and fight because that's what you're doing you dumb goat.]

but like i said, i dont even know how much different itd be than what we've already got. If this is enough, then sure, but if this ain't enough, then why the hell would i lead her on like that?

We don't know each other that well, so I don't know why you did? I mean, I have guesses but I don't wanna assume.

[Maybe it was to get his approval as Fie's family, or for advice, or to try to have someone who knew Fie tell him the "right answer". Any number of things]

You'd only lead her on if you lie and tell her you two can be together forever. Not that she'd buy it if you did.

Really... she's aware of our situation here as much as we are. And she's experienced loss before. We weren't her first family, and we've lost people too since becoming a class. She knows grief well enough to be able to decide for herself if she's willing to grieve for you too when the time comes.

[And on that note, it's apparently time to point out the flipping obvious to this dude]

Also the difference would be that you guys would kiss and do other stuff like that sometimes.

[Ok they EASIEST thing to tackle here is the last and so he will:]

that parts obvious. thats not what i'm asking.

[then USE YOUR FUCKING WORDS, ARAGAKI.

but he can't say elliot hasn't given him things to think about in regards to this. Like the fact that maybe he's the one who has to figure out what affection means to him and whether or not it applies to Fie. No one can just swoop in with an answer.]

but thanks. i guess.
i'll figure something out about all this. guess theres not exactly a rush.

[except for how fucking starry-eyes machias was when talking about her at the party but. you know whatever.]

Well, I don't know exactly what else you'd be asking about unless you tell me what you mean by "different".

[USE YOUR WORDS SHINJIRO]

Yeah, I always find the best decisions come from long, careful thought.

That said, don't use it as an excuse to procrastinate and not address it. Fie won't wait forever.

yeah. yeah i know.

sorry, i'm pretty shit at this. but you gave me plenty to think on. so. yeah.

thanks.

Don't worry about that. No one starts off as an expert on this kinda stuff, and it's not like there's one right way to do it either.

But I'm glad I could help. Just be true to your own feelings, and that'll give you your answer.

Good luck!

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