fiddlestick | IC Inbox (Kaisou)

I see...

[He watches Jusis in silence for a moment. From body language alone...yeah, he can tell Jusis is trying extra hard tonight not to let anything show. Jusis has always been a bit stiff, but tonight he might as well be made of glass from the way he's holding himself.

...

Well, might as well use this trick. While Jusis is focusing on keeping himself together, Elliot will shift his form. Then an orange cat with green eyes will climb up onto Jusis's lap and move to make himself comfortable on him. ]

[Jusis isn't looking at Elliot at the time. So, he's completely caught off-guard when there's suddenly a cat on his lap. His eyes are almost comically wide in shock as Elliot makes himself comfortable.]

Oh. Um.

[That's a neat trick he hasn't seen his friend do before. He hesitates before gently, cautiously, petting Elliot's soft fur.]

[There is the very softest sound of a purr at the petting. Look, he can't help it okay. He so rarely lets people pet him unless their name is Rean.]

Ha...I figured it'd be easier for you if I assumed this form.

[He knows his friend needs comfort, but he also knows how hard it is for him to reach out for it. And it's easier to get it from a cat than a person]

...I'm here for whatever you need. If you want to talk about it, I'll listen. Otherwise, I'm okay with just being here with you.

[Jusis would be a hell of a lot more shocked by a talking cat if he didn't have one for a best friend in the Order. As it is, he's surprised, but not enough to stop petting Elliot. The blond listens, and remains silent for some time as emotion builds up with every second going by with a cat purring softly on him.

Albareas don't cry.

He grits his teeth, tensing slightly.

Then I'm not an Albarea for a few minutes.

Tears slowly drip down his cheeks, probably getting on his friend's fur. His shoulders shake with barely suppressed emotion, but it's a fight he's very swiftly losing. He's frustrated. He's powerless. But most of all, most damning of all, he's guilty.

Jusis gives up enough of his tattered dignity to bury his face into Elliot's orange fur. A soft, choked sob escapes him, but only the once. Just once in a moment of weakness. He whispers in German a heartfelt, "I'm sorry." He's not sure if it's to Elliot, Ash, the victims, or someone else.]

[Elliot had a feeling this might happen. Just as he thought, his friend was made of glass tonight. It didn't take much for the cracks to overwhelm him.

That was fine, Elliot was fine with letting him break for a moment and being there to help. He doesn't say words, but rather keeps purring as he nuzzles Jusis with love and affection as his dear friend cries.

Cry it out, Jusis. Cry as much as you need. He's here for you]

[Jusis certainly does, with the unconditional affection breaking him further. He doesn't deserve it, but here Elliot is: giving him that very affection and reassurance.

After a few minutes, the tears stop and he doesn't feel as fragile. The blond takes a few deep breaths before sitting up and wiping his face. Orange fur is still sticking to his face, but nothing a good washing can't take care of.]

I... Thank you, Elliot. I'm sorry for your fur.

[His accent is a little thicker from that emotional release. He clears his throat.]

Let me wash my face. Ash said he's okay with sharing our conversation with you, and... Well. You should hear it from one of us anyway.

[But Jusis needs to make sure his composure has been fully regained.]

[He does deserve it, as far as Elliot's concerned. And he'll keep giving that affection until Jusis calms down. When Jusis apologizes, he'll give a soft "mrow" sound of protest]

It's alright, Jusis. It's just fur.

[He wasn't exactly vein about this form, and he's plenty used to Rean messing up his fur with his petting. Maybe in a more cheerful moment he would've teased Jusis about the fur sticking to his face, but this hardly seems like a good moment for that- so he'll not remark on it.

Instead at Jusis's request, he'll jump off his lap and back onto the couch. He can't lie, the idea of learning whatever made both Ash and Jusis so upset has him feeling anxious. But Elliot wasn't one to ignore the truth, and he certainly wouldn't start when a truth was hurting his family so. ]

Okay. You know where the bathroom is, so do what you need and I'll listen when you're ready.

[While Jusis does that he'll probably clean his own fur-- but not until after Jusis is in the bathroom because he's still too human to not feel self-conscious about licking himself on front of others okay]

[Jusis nods and waits for Elliot to leap off his lap. He heads over to the bathroom, not completely shutting the door. After splashing his face a few times with cold water, Jusis towels himself dry and stares at his reflection in the mirror. No more fur, though his eyes look a bit worse for wear, but there's nothing he can really do about that. Almost reluctantly, he heads back out into the living room to face the music.

The blond sits back down on the couch, though this time he leans back instead of having proper posture. Jusis will wait until Elliot's more comfortable before speaking again.]

Alright. First, to give a brief background, there's a highly elusive and dangerous organization known as Krusnik. They operate in secret and there are multiple cells, but that's about where most reliable information you'll find on them ends. However, there's a strong indication that they only target members of the magical community.

[He's not looking at Elliot at this point. Rather, Jusis is glaring a hole in the wall.]

Ash said he was taken at the age of three. From what he was able to gather, they were attempting to create a god. In order to achieve that, they needed the kid to be possessed, and... well. The best odds of that happening are by sending them through stable Spirit Gates, specifically the ones that are more likely to get them killed. Ash had to survive around six or seven years of that process, and came out of it "successfully" possessed, but... most of those children didn't make it.

[Now for the hard part. Something he hasn't told Ash, mostly because doing so at that time would not have helped the kid in any way. Jusis wants to wait until Ash is in a better spot emotionally and mentally before he tells him. In the meantime... it's only right that Elliot knows. Especially since he cried on him.]

...I've known of Krusnik since I was maybe 17. Helmut—[There's an uncharacteristically slight, bitterly venomous edge when he says the name. He takes a split second to control himself.]—took me to a hidden part of Kreuzen Corporation, our family business. That was when I saw that he'd been taking anyone with magic he could find a use for as a way to compete with other major corporations. Seers, primarily. I never knew where they came from, but seeing one my own age in a cage... that was when I started remembering.

Later, I overheard him talking with Rufus about their partnership with Krusnik. I didn't stick around long enough to get details, but I was able to get the basic idea, and looking at the company's books confirmed it. We were funding them, at least in part. I've no idea what on Earth my brother is thinking, but I joined the Order after graduating and left Germany behind.

[He sighs softly, pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes. He looks... tired.]

That's why I'm a prosecutor. I can't quit until they've answered for what they've done, but that requires compiling as much evidence as possible. So... [Finally, Jusis looks at Elliot.] Now you know. I've not yet told Ash this. It didn't feel right.

[By the time Jusis is out of the bathroom, he's finished fixing his own fur. He debated whether or not it'd be better to shift back into human form- but ultimately he decides to remain a feline. It'd probably be easier for Jusis to vent to a cat with less expressions than a human who is prone to crying.

Which not long after he makes himself comfortable (resting against Jusis's thigh this time, to both continue giving that warm support but also give a bit a space as necessary) ... he finds himself really glad he made that decision. The story that Jusis tells hurts. It's horrifying. To think there was a group like that, doing that to children.

That haunting memory flickers by in his mind once again. That blue hair girl, Millium- her chest cut open. All for some twisted sacrifice-]

Those ... bastards... to do something so awful...

[He utters to himself, profanity that is almost unheard of coming from Elliot's mouth and yet the moment calls for it. He was so sick of selfish monsters that hurt innocents for their own goals. The Black Workshop, Belos, Snow's mom, and now this. Just why was there so many? He didn't understand it at all.

But the story continues. Of course Helmut was connected. If anything, it puts pieces into place to explain Jusis's situation in this life time. This was the line that the man crossed to make Jusis willing to work with the Black Order, to go to law school, to leave his country.

Jusis...has been shouldering this a long time, hasn't he? He was always so dutiful, took his family's crimes harder than anyone else. No wonder his shoulders sagged from all the weight put upon them.

Ash was very much a victim of Krusnik. He suffered in ways no child should. But Jusis? In Elliot's eyes, he was just as much a victim.

When the story finishes, there's a long heavy silence between them, as Elliot figures out what to say. ]

Jusis.... [Rean was always better at speeches than him, so instead, he'll move to climb back on Jusis's lap, moving to rest his head against his chest- the closest he can do to a hug in this form. ] Helmut...is a monster. So is everyone with Krusnik. All of them need to be taken down. [either by the legal process or by murder- honestly Elliot isn't picky to which.]

...But you aren't, okay?

[It's very rare to hear Elliot swear, but the moment calls for it. He can be forgiven, though the jury's still out on Jusis. At least, that's how the blond views it.

The silence is heavy as he waits for Elliot's reaction. Somehow, Jusis isn't expecting for his friend to climb up onto him and give him a cat hug. He's stunned, though it's certainly softened given that it's a cat. After a moment of hesitation, Jusis wraps his arms around Elliot, though he's mindful of the ginger's comfort levels.

Jusis feels like his heart clenches when he's told he's not a monster. He can't look at his friend.]

It's... Hard for me to believe that. [A reluctant admission, but Elliot should hear some of his truth.] But I must take some responsibility for the actions of that side of my family. Perhaps I'm not the monster they are, but that doesn't mean I'm blameless.

[Though, a part of him that's been with him since childhood asks the question again, though a little differently than back then. A question he's afraid to know the answer to, and has ignored for almost two decades.

Is there something wrong with me? Did I do something to deserve having to live two lifetimes with this monster for a father?]

[He appreciates the mindfulness to his comfort levels, but he makes no resistance to Jusis hugging him back. This wasn't the same as his biological family squeezing him to death because they could. But more just giving Jusis some comfort and stability - things he tends to deny that]

I know, I'm sure it's very hard to believe. [But it doesn't mean he's right. He gives a little sigh and crane his head so he's looking up at Jusis]

Let me put it this way: my father is a general in the US military. Like his father before him and his father before him. It's a proud family tradition...one that I didn't follow.

Yet...by your line of logic, I would be partly to blame for the War in Afghanistan, and the War in Iraq. Not to mention all the wars the Craigs have ever willingly served in, or all the military operations that didn't count as wars. All of those would be my fault, according to what you're thinking. Because I didn't find some way to stop the US from going to war when I was a kid, I'm to blame.

But that'd be absurd to blame myself for that stuff...right?

Edited 2023-02-21 17:08 (UTC)

[Jusis is quiet, glancing down at Elliot when he starts talking. The way his friend lays it out so logically does help a lot. Extreme, maybe, but comparable enough to drive the point home. It's enough to make him remember a point in his past life where guilt almost drove him to do something drastic.

He closes his eyes for a moment, and then nods.]

You're right. I almost lost myself to that guilt.

[It's almost comforting to know that's a consistent struggle for him, in a strange way.]

I'm quite lucky to have you here to help put it into perspective. Thank you, Elliot.

[Good, it seems his point got through to him. He'll rest his head again on his chest and give a loud, loving purr. ]

Mm, I can't blame you. I know my own dark thoughts get the better of me sometimes too.

[Okay so maybe not guilt about that, but other regrets and concerns. It's easy to spiral when you're on your own.]

Honestly, I don't know how much help I can be with fighting Krusnik or your father- I am just a music teacher, and music doesn't exactly help in a courtroom. [There's a time and place for the power of music, the courts is not it] But I do know that I'm going to do my best to be there for you and Ash in every way I can.

[Jusis has never had a cat before or really ever interacted with one, so he's not entirely certain what the purring means, but it's gotta be positive. Right??? At least, he'll try to scratch behind Elliot's ear. He thinks that's a good spot for cats.

His reaffirmation of support does a lot to make Jusis finally relax with a small smile.]

Heh. Your support is more than sufficient. I may have wallowed in unnecessary guilt without you talking me back from the ledge, so to speak.

[The blond sighs softly.]

Not to mention, it's enough to have a reminder that the world isn't as dark as it looks. It's easy in my line of work to lose sight of the fact that there are far more bright spots.

[it's a very positive thing! When Jusis scratches behind his ears, the purring only gets stronger and he'll compulsively nuzzle against him more. Ah yes. That's the good kitty stuff yes]

Awww, Jusis...

[It's sweet to hear all that!!]

Well, I know I've had that feeling before. The world can be a pretty dark place sometimes, but...there's plenty of light too. We'll all do our best to remind ourselves of that, okay?

[He knows he can't always be mister sunshine and positivity, but honestly...it's a lot easier with Jusis, Rean and Ash in his life. Much, much easier]

Edited 2023-02-21 20:30 (UTC)

[How dare Elliot be this cute as a cat. Jusis can't stop a warmer smile because of that!]

I believe that's a fair trade. I may not be the best at it, but I think I can make up for that by being good company, at least.

[He shifts a little in his seat to get more comfortable. With the way Elliot is looking right now, he's resigned himself to being here a while.]

[Sorry can't help it, cats only come in cute. ]

Hehe, sounds fair to me!

[He feels that shift and he'll move his own body along with it, gonna just openly rest against Jusis's chest oh yes]

Speaking of...how about you stay the night? I got a spare bedroom you can use, and it gets pretty lonely without Rean here so I know I'd appreciate the company.

[He'll leave the real reason unspoken, and that's that he thinks Jusis needs some time to collect himself and rest before he goes back into the thick of things. ]

[Jusis finds himself getting into a rhythm for petting his cat friend. He's going to gently scratch behind both ears at once. Honestly, he's not even thinking about it right this second.

He thinks about the offer before nodding. That might be for the best. Besides, it's an innocent enough request that he doesn't think much of it.]

Very well. I'll have to text Fugo to let him know. Technically, I'm his and Ash's guardian while we're here.

[And Fugo doesn't need to see Jusis like this.]

[You know what, he could really get used to these Jusis pets. As much as he loves Rean's affection, he wasn't the most gentle when it came to cats. Not like Jusis. So yeah, you better believe the purring is going to continue]

Eheh, that's right. Fugo's old enough, so I'm sure he'd enjoy a night to himself.

[Jusis will never know.]

That's true, and I suppose it can't hurt for one night.

[He's going to use one hand to take out his phone without jostling Elliot too much, and so he doesn't have to stop petting him since he likes it so much. The blond sends a quick text before placing his phone on the arm of the couch.

And Jusis is going to cuddle the cat since this is surprisingly healing.]

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